Our Couches Are Too Busy To Talk To Us

Our couches have decided they’re too cool for us. When they first moved in, these albino twins just stared blankly in different directions and sighed all day. We tried to get to know them but they shunned our advances. Sure, they were polite about it but we got the message. You can look but don’t touch. No loitering. Buzz off. Get Lost. No ands, ifs, or butts.

We just thought they were bored. Little did we know that their ennui masked ambition. Clandestinely, they were making plans. Grand schemes involving networking, booking agents, and photo ops. They wanted more than a couched life. And they were willing to work for it. We have to admit, we admire their tenacity. Maybe one day they will land that most coveted of couch posts and bask in the limelight of couching by rising to that most hallowed of occupations as Couches-On-A-Talk-Show. Perhaps their recent work is nothing but a life in rehearsal for that day. But we can only make guesses. Our couches are too busy to talk to us.

Recent appearances:

Posing for book covers.

Hanging out with up and coming rock stars.